Already forgot to post an entry yesterday. But who's keeping tabs anyways? Yesterday was a day of unpacking and settling in. But as the boxes empty up and I run out of things to occupy my time, little creepers worm their way into my unoccupied mind reminding me that I miss everyone at home. It's ok because I know that is part of life but I still let myself feel how much I miss them and long for them because it just shows how much love I have for them. Josh cooked me supper last night which was fun. I keep forgetting that, unlike the past history of our long-distance dating relationship, there is no end to our time together and that makes me happy.
Today, Josh is back to work in the office. Most of my things are unpacked and I'm fighting the urge to busy myself with other things. I have learned something about myself as of today. I read a line in a book about how many people allow the value and meaning of their work to be determined by a paycheck. I have never thought much about it because I don't really give a poo about money. What I realized, is that I do the same thing but with "meaningful" work. I can't be content or feel I have a purpose unless I am doing something "meaningful" with my time. Which might seem fine, until there are times like now in my life where I have been given a break from life. Time to learn about and explore what marriage is. And I find it very difficult to feel that I am doing anything of value. Which I think means that I do, in fact, derive the meaning and value of my work, from external forces, rather than from the only One from whom real meaning and value is created.
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